Rules are for Other People

If you are a person who doesn’t like rules then you would really appreciate our city. It didn’t take me long to discover that nobody here was following any rules except for me. Whether it’s motorists, cyclists, pedestrians, neighbors or anyone else, the motto appears to be “rules are for other people”. One way streets – which way! Red lights – I’m colorblind! Pedestrian crosswalks – only for dummies! No dogs on the beach – hey, my dog can’t read! No cell phones while driving – I’ll drink coffee instead! No cycling – hah hah! No parking – well, that’s an issue for Neatstep!…..

I was determined not to abandon my principles until, one summer day, I received a warning for illegal garden-watering . I phoned to protest and the clerk said, “Is that the house with the big tree?” How do you know? “It’s in the photo!” You took a photo? “The officer did!” I was just testing my sprinklers! “I’ll make a note in your file!” You have a file on me? This is getting worse!

I had followed every rule I could and here I was being targeted. So I’ve decided, “if you can’t beat them, join them!” From now on, there is only one rule for me – “rules are for other people!”